street lamps & clementines

Smudge on the Wall: A One Act

Scene 1: Our shittee downstairs deli, generally only frequented on rainy days when no one wants to leave the building to get anything better.  Lunchtime.

Cook:  What would you like?
Me:  Chicken salad on toasted wheat.
            **3 minutes pass**
Cook:  What would you like?
Me:  Chicken salad on toasted wheat.
Cook:  Chicken salad on toasted wheat?
Me:  Yes, please.
            **another 3 minutes pass**
Cook:  Chicken salad on toasted wheat?
Me:  YES.
Cook:  You want your bread toasted?
Me:  YES PLEASE.

Scene 2:  Five minutes later.  My office, which has the lived-in look of someone who works too much and buys too much etsy art.  Smells of peonies and rage.

Me (directly to audience):  WHEN I UNWRAPPED MY SANDWICH UPSTAIRS, WAS MY BREAD TOASTED?  NO, IT EFFING WASN’T.